When you meet Mary Baxter, it is clear that family comes first for her. Mary and her grandchildren, five-year-old Amos and three-year-old Caroline, recently visited our Laconia office on what they call their “Pay It Forward” day; they brought breakfast treats and bright sunflowers that Amos and Caroline had proudly cut themselves that morning for our Laconia-based team members as thanks for the care and comfort they provided her family when her father was on hospice care.

Last year when her father, Paul Boudreau of Lochmere, was nearing the end of his life and transitioned to hospice care with Granite VNA, Mary left her job and moved into her parents’ home to spend as much time possible with them and to care for him and her mother Jean, who had dementia.

Paul’s care team began the family’s hospice journey by explaining the hospice process and answering their questions. While Paul wasn’t initially keen on having strangers in his home, as time moved forward, it brought him great comfort.

“Dad was of a certain generation who had a way to do things and valued their privacy and independence,” Mary said.

The Granite VNA hospice team brought more than medical care – they treated Paul and his family with dignity and offered compassion and constant support. Nurses not only tended to her dad’s needs but also taught Mary how to confidently care for him herself. Social workers also checked-in regularly: “No matter the time of day, if I called, someone always called back,” Mary said. “Dad’s care team was organized, respectful, and they treated him like family. Even in his last days, dressed in his suspenders, he was grateful for the chemistry he shared with them.”

“I used to think hospice was only for people in their final days,” Mary shared. “But I learned that people can be on hospice care for a long time, and sometimes even come off. That’s when I truly understood how broad and meaningful hospice is.”

Mary says she practices gratitude every day and how, during her family’s hospice journey, when things would inevitably get heavy and overwhelming, her dad’s nurses would be there to take the weight off her shoulders and allow her to focus on the little things that brought her a sense of normalcy and grace; simple tasks like making toast for her dad or greeting a neighbor who dropped-off fresh asparagus for him to enjoy reminded her that, comfort can be found in the simplest moments.

Mary appreciated that her dad’s hospice care wasn’t just about him, it was about her and her mother, and the rest of their family as well.

“My mother’s dementia symptoms would sometimes increase and, rather than seeing it as disruptive, Dad’s nurses handled it with grace. It was as if they expected it and accepted it as part of the process,” she said. “And they would somehow notice when I would go outside to catch my breath and would come and stand with me. It was this unspoken feeling like, ‘We got you; you can do this, we’re here to help you,’ and they did.”

Sadly, Mary’s mother passed away almost exactly two months after her beloved Paul.

Mary grew to understand that hospice is about so much more than medication and comfort measures.

“Our hospice journey was about honoring my father’s wishes and making sure I was cared for, too,” she said. “I still can’t believe the outreach and support I continue to receive from Granite VNA; thank God these services are here.”